In the beginning God created the dance floor and the DJ booth. Now the beat was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the breaks. And God said, “Let there be house” and there was house music. God saw that the house music was good, and God separated the house from the Disco. God called the East coast house “Garage,” and the West Coast House God called “Warehouse.” And there was evening dance, and there was morning dance—the first day of house.

And God said, “Let there be an expanse between the clubs to separate club from club.” So, God made the expanse and separated the club under the expanse from the club above it. And it was so. God called the expanse “Deep House.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the second day. And God said, “Let the club under the sky be gathered to one place, and let dry ground appear.” And it was so. God called the dry ground “tea dance” and the gathered waters God called “sweat.” And God saw that it was good.

Then God said, “Let the DJ produce groove: seed-bearing groove and dance on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds.” And it was so. The land produced dance: DJs bearing seed according to their kinds and producers bearing fruit with seed in it according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. And God said, “Let there be lights in the expanse of the ceiling sky to separate the day from the night and let them serve as signs to mark seasons and days and years. God made two great lights—the disco ball light to govern center ceiling sky and the lesser laser light to govern DJ booth. God also made the stars.

And God saw that it was good. And God said, “Let the sweat and the tears drip from every living creature that dances.”

And it remains so…